Seeing that Dunstan has noticed her captivity, Una asks-in a way that obviously does not invite a double entendre-if he’ll “liberate” her. The one he buys costs a kiss, she says, and they lock lips. #thehipsterscomethĭunstan covers for his transfixion by asking about buying an enchanted flower. Note to self: if I ever open a bar, I’m going to call it Ditchwater Sal’s and serve fifty different cocktails based on small-batch gin. She is, in fact, Princess Una of Stormhold (Kate Magowan), held captive by a witch named Ditchwater Sal (Melanie Hill). His gaze falls on an exceedingly beautiful young woman sitting in the doorway of a dainty yellow carriage that looks like it might house Little Bo Peep on the weekends.
#Stardust humphrey full#
He stumbles upon a market town near the wall and promptly encounters a world full of exotic sights and sounds, of flashes of colorful fabrics and flickering flames. point? You know, someplace where it’s not guarded? The thing’s only about as tall as an average adult. Why doesn’t anyone in England just hop over the wall at literally. One night Dunstan, perplexed by said wall, brazenly steals through its solitary gap-guarded around the clock by a wizened watchman with mutton chops in a top hat, because of course he has mutton chops and wears a top hat-to find out what lurks on the other side. The story begins with Dunstan Thorn (Ben Barnes), a teenage boy who lives in an English country village called Wall (so named for the wall that runs alongside it) that looks like it came out of a fucking Thomas Kinkade painting. WHAAAAAT.Īlso, the iPhone had just been released a few weeks earlier. WHICH YOU HAD TO PUT IN AN ACTUAL DVD PLAYER.
#Stardust humphrey movie#
I don’t really have any significant context for my first viewing of the movie ten years ago, except that I think it was on a Netflix DVD. Its premise, its plot elements, its execution, its occasionally self-aware musical score. Narration by the one and only Sir Ian McKellen. Let me just begin by saying that Stardust is a bonkers movie.įlying necklaces. Max DeCurtins revisits Stardust, which proves to be all zany plot with little depth, and maybe that’s just the kind of thing we need right now.